How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie. There’s not much that I can say about this amazing book that hasn’t been said already.
I’ll go with my own personal experience with this one, how did it influence my behaviour, my attitude, and my relationships.
Dale Carnegie is an amazing author, if dancing with a pen on a paper was a sport, he’d be the ultimate heavyweight champion.
He’s writing style is direct, sincere and to the point. I usually find repetition unproductive, but Carnegie’s use of repetition helps with solidifying certain principles without boring you to tears.
Before we get into more details about the book itself, let me give you a before picture of myself.
I’m an introvert, yet contrary to popular belief about introverts I’m socially active with many friends with different backgrounds, I do public speaking, I always making people around me laugh, take lead on social occasions, and easily make small talks with strangers.
I’ve never had major problems in dealing with people even with the hard ones, but there were some situations where I couldn’t understand the other person.
For example, I couldn’t understand why someone is relentlessly pushing back on a something painfully obvious, even after admitting that it was the correct decision.
At these times I thought that this person is just being illogical or too egocentric and moved on, yet deep down I knew something wasn’t adding up.
Back to the book, How to Win Friends & Influence People takes a fundamentalist approach to dealing with people.
In Part 1 Fundamental Techniques in Handling People the author establishes three ground rules of the game which forms the base for the rest of the book.
The author argues that within the list of our basic needs, things like food, shelter, and sleep, lies another need that is seldom satisfied : Feeling of Importance or as Freud calls it the desire to be great.
This was a big
Aha! moment for me and puzzle pieces started to fit in. This was the missing link: The Feeling of Importance .
The rest of the book is full of practical techniques revolves around the three principles discussed in Part 1 Fundamental Techniques in Handling People.
How to Win Friends & Influence People is definitely one of the most influential books in my life.
Would I recommend it? You bet I do!
Would I read it again? For sure.
10 out of 10.